I've found myself repeating the same sort of thing over and over in various conversations lately:
I just need to locate some motivation.
I don't know why I'm so unmotivated lately.
Heck, I can't even get motivated to watch TV--and that's what a person does when they have no motivation!
Why am I so unmotivated lately?
Now, all this could be just a product of needing my meds adjusted or something, but it's caused me to spend a fair bit of time just contemplating motivation; what it is, where it comes from, if all sources of motivation are healthy (or at least healthier than total apathy), whether just being 'generally motivated' is possible or if one can only be motivated for or toward particular things. Certainly, there are times when I've been very motivated to go for a hike and not very motivated to clean house. But there have also been times when I felt what I would call 'generally motivated'--up for doing both the things that I want to do and the things that I need to do. Are normal people more likely to have this general sort of motivation? Even if somewhat begrudgingly?
So, as often happens, I have begun a post on one day and then come back to it later. At this point, I'm feeling a tiny bit more motivated than last week, but not much. But I'm definitely out of whatever motivation I had to contemplate motivation in any philosophical sort of way. So you lucked out there.
The husband and I flew back home for his little brother's wedding over the weekend. It was a truly lovely (and mercifully short) ceremony followed by a full dinner, music/dancing, and an open bar. I had Woodford and coke. It was good times.
This post is going absolutely nowhere. I'm gonna go ahead and cut my losses...